Ten Short Film Reviews 6

The Punisher – 1989, Mark Goldblatt
Dolph Lungren was young, blond and completely miscast as Frank Castle. With his boot polish stubble and dyed black quiff he looks like a zombie Elvis. Lame B- Movie that it is, it’s probably the best of the three Punisher efforts so far. Slightly reminiscent of Schwarzenegger’s Raw Deal. I think Scott Hall aka Razer Ramon would make a good Punisher.

Dragnet – 1987, Tom Mankiewicz
I had this film recorded on video as a child and I must have watched it ten times. Then I watched it for the first time in what must have been at least 12 years. It’s OK, but Dan Aykroyd and Tom Hanks have each made better films. Like lots of eighties films it seems confused about its target audience. It’s a low brow film full of slapstick, but then suddenly there will be a very adult joke thrown in out of nowhere.

Battleship Potemkin – 1925, Sergei Eisenstein
It’s hard to appreciate now just how powerful the reaction to this film must have been in 1925. It’s very dramatic and the audiences at the time would have been shocked by the violence and won over by the message. Historically important as propaganda as well as experimental film making as the editing techniques were not common at the time.

The Incredible Hulk – 2008, Louis Leterrier
Ang Lee got a lot of stick for taking the Hulk too seriously. Five years later (with the benefit of a lot of other comic book films having gotten it right and wrong since) the guy who directed the first two Transporter films was never going to try anything other than making a fun comic book action film with great fight sequences. Leterrier played it safe and he was rewarded with Clash of The Titans, where he played it safe again. We might not hear from him again any time soon.

Body Of Lies – 2008, Ridley Scott
One of Russell Crowe’s best performances and one of Leonardo DiCaprio’s most typical. It’s a good film, very watchable. Ridley is going for the same vibe as Black Hawk Down, but it’s not as gung-ho or as exiting.

Steel Dawn – 1987, Lance Hool
‘He is the desert warrior, carving the future with his sword.’
This is how I’ll remember Patrick Swayze, as a lone warrior roaming a post apocalyptic scorched earth, helping those in need. Working the land, meditating, and beating up thugs, as I like to imagine he did in real life.
Low budget sci-fi romp with some surprisingly picturesque shots of the desert in which it was filmed (no idea which one). Reminded me of the animated series Fist of The North Star.

Paper Moon – 1973, Peter Bogdanovich
1973 was a good year for child actresses. Linda Blair was nominated for her performance as the possessed girl in The Exorcist, but she lost to ten year old Tatum O’ Neil who won the Oscar for best actress for her performance in Paper Moon. She plays a little girl tagging along with a con man (played by her actual father Ryan) as they make their way across dust bowl depression era Kansas selling Bibles to the recently bereaved. It’s an excellent film, a bit like O Brother, Where Art Thou? but without the singing.

The Mechanik – 2005, Dolph Lundgren
Former Soviet block countries have a lot to offer the straight-to –DVD action market. Dolph’s second attempt at directing an action film is a bit sterile, but it does well with the limited budget. He relies far too much on over saturated slow motion though.

Star Trek – 2009, JJ Abrams
JJ Abrams has a thing about getting to the heart of cinema. It’s admirable that he is keen to try different things and the fact that the movie studio moneymen have shown such faith in him is a reassuring sign in Hollywood’s commitment to trying something different. As good as JJ’s films are he is a bit of a one trick pony. Mission Impossible 3 features the most self aware plot devise ever used in a film; The Rabbit’s Foot. No prizes for identifying the Maguffin, but you can be forgiven at being slightly perturbed by the brazen and almost self referential use of it. Cloverfield has a similar technique of not worrying about explaining why the events are happening, just that they are entertaining. Both of these films get away with it, Star Trek...not so much.
When I first watched it at the cinema I was too busy being very self-satisfied and identifying all the references to the Star Trek universe to notice how little explanation was given to the villain of the piece. The audience learns just enough about Eric Bana’s bad guy to know what he’s doing and why, and that it’s very important that Kirk and the gang stop him. Overall it’s very good though.

The Lost Boys – 1987, Joel Schumacher
It took me a long time to get round to watching ‘The Original Comedy Horror’ but I’m glad I finally did. It’s actually worthy of the cult following it attained. Kiefer Sutherland should start rocking the bleach blond mullet again.